


Working things out

by Kaelynisfree



Category: Hannibal (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, F/M, Falling In Love, Internal Monologue
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-01-23
Updated: 2015-01-23
Packaged: 2018-03-08 17:52:11
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 515
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3218114
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kaelynisfree/pseuds/Kaelynisfree
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>She isn't in love with him, right?</p>
            </blockquote>





	Working things out

**Author's Note:**

> It's in second person. Alana basically works out her feelings for Will?

It isn’t love, but you can see how people could mistake it for all different kinds of feelings. You’ve seen it in other people but never have experienced it before personally. And you hate to label things quietly, so you decide to let it sit until you are sure.

Now, you’re not one to hide the truth. You say what’s on your mind and you express your feelings honestly; yet you’ve never felt so exposed before. 

It’s like you’re naked or like you’re wearing a robe with nothing underneath and any moment the robe could fall away and everyone would be able to see everything.

You’re afraid of not being able to control what they might see; of how they might interpret what they see. 

It’s the first time you feel something and you didn’t tell anyone about it. Maybe if you don’t say it out loud, it will disappear. 

And yet, there’s a part of you that doesn’t want it to go away. You care about him so much. You didn’t think you would at first, but you do. He’s so broken, and yet he’s so alive that you can see him unbroken and thriving.

Maybe it is love, maybe it isn’t. 

Whatever it is, you try to mask it as professional curiosity… at first. But in time you begin to empathize with him. 

But it’s more than empathy. It is almost as if with him, you see the future. You see what might happen and it hurts you to think that he might not come out of it unscathed. 

The first few times you are alone together, you cannot catch your breath. Your heart beats so fast you’re sure that when you speak, your voice wavers. But he’s so sweet; he doesn’t notice. Or he pretends not to notice. 

You’re not love sick. You don’t pine after him. But there are moments when you are together that you want to reach out and touch him. And before you fall asleep at night, you often think about that kiss. 

You also think about how you’ve treated him since. 

Unstable. You called him that because that’s what he is, but at this point you’re not sure if you care. Yes, you’re protecting yourself, but you could be protecting him. 

You make him breakfast; he barely talks and when he does, he stumbles over his words or tries to cover up an awkward thought. You can tell he’s hiding something, but he’s not very good at hiding it. 

You’re almost thankful that you can see his faults. The devil you know is better than the devil you don’t. 

You often site this when people ask you why you often treat the criminally insane. Not that Will is some sort of devil. No, he see’s into their hearts, not their heads, and he makes them human. 

If that isn’t saintly, you don’t know what is. 

 He is far from perfect. But Will Graham is always going to be Will Graham and you know you need him in your life. 

But you aren’t in love with him, right?


End file.
